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Embracing the pain

August 20th, 2013

One of the most game-changing jem’s of wisdom that you can learn on your path to being happier and healthier is ironically, to actually allow yourself to feel and accept negative emotions too. This doesn’t mean dwelling on them, rather it means allowing them to pass through you with acceptance, and then by doing this, and being open to different solutions with a gentle and positive attitude, you can overcome challenging situations and  learn  your valuable life-lesson on the way. There is nothing wrong with negative feelings, in fact – if we acknowledge and accept them, without dwelling on them, and allow them to point us in a different direction, they can result in a positive outcome. In a sport sense, it helps too, I have found that when, ‘the going gets tough,’ the secret is to embrace the pain, rather than run from it. Or, as Emma Snowsill once told me her valued coach told her:

“Chase the pain and make it your friend.”

The first time I learnt this type of concept was from a day of workshops I participated in at the, ‘International Convention on Happiness and It’s Causes,’ six years ago. I learnt this from Tal Ben-Shahar, who is, ‘is an author and lecturer, who taught the largest course at Harvard on “Positive Psychology” and the third largest on “The Psychology of Leadership.”

His game-changer to me was this:

“give yourself permission to be human’ and ‘accept negative emotions like anger, stress, sadness and anxiety because then you are more likely to overcome them.’

In a positive sense, acknowledging your feelings is acknowledging your soul’s presence and by listening/accepting your feelings, (without getting caught up in them), you can start to be guided towards a more fulfilling life. It helps you to realise that your feelings are like a compass, pointing you in the direction of a purposeful life and away from a less fulfilling life. One of the ways to do this is by…

1. Following your joy!

2. Paying attention to what actions and moments bring you joy, gratitude, health, happiness and wellbeing.

3. Paying attention to actions of love and what you love, because deep within your soul, you are love, and an expression of the Divine.


I created an ebook and app to help you with this, both at a low price so it is affordable….

  • The App can be purchased from iTunes by clicking on the picture below:

In collaboration with Tim Oldmeadow – My Inspirations App


I’m going to finish with another little/big game-changer I have been consistently doing following on from my gratitude  post in the past. This is because I believe in gratitude so much because it has and is transforming my life in hugely positive ways.

Each night, as I lie in bed before I fall asleep, I say thank you for what I am grateful for. I always start with my warm, comfy, cosy bed and then it goes on…. A lovely home and roof over my head (millions in the world are starving and homeless), my healthy, loving and happy family members (there are so many!), a new little niece, my authentic friends, truly beautiful and special clients, a smile and friendly banter from my coffee-shop peoples, great inspiring and encouraging coaches, motivational speaking bookings coming in fast, watching the sunlight coming through the trees and looking so pretty…and so on. It is different every night and is a lovely way to fall asleep.

…And I am grateful to you my reader, I hope this helps you in any way, small or big or in-between in your own very special life.

Love Grace